What does it mean to submit? Webster’s dictionary defines submitting as to yield to governance or authority. To present or propose to another for review, consideration, or decision. Or to defer to or consent to abide by the opinion or authority of another.

Submitting has always be a touchy subject for me. I have always prided myself on being a strong black woman, why would I let go of that and submit to a man. I’m sure I’m not the only person who thought this at some point in time. Before I was married I could never understand this concept. I knew it said it in the bible, but I wondered did it really mean it. All of the definitions listed above are good, but they fall short when you want to define what it means to submit to your husband.

I’ve spent countless hours reading and studying on how to properly submit to my husband, the bible says Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands as is fitting in the Lord. (Col 3:18) To me I thought if I submitted completely to him that meant losing who I am. Losing the woman I worked so hard to become and frankly I wasn’t having it. In Ephesians 5:22 Paul says Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is Savior. In a marriage when a wife is called to submit to her husband I learned that she isn’t losing her identity and becoming a doormat, she is allowing her husband to be the spiritual leader to her. What I didn’t realize is submission goes both ways. The husband is also submitting, he is now making decisions that will be for the better of his family and not solely on what would benefit him. He is there to serve his wife, to love his wife and to spiritually guide his wife. His leadership in Christ is what the family will follow. Submission is a spiritual journey for both husband and wife.

You know what’s funny I have been married seven years and I only have one real example of submission that I can think of to share. I never really knew what it was to submit to my husband. I wasn’t raised in a house where submission was something normal. In my house woman were always dominant. I grew up in a house full of women; we were strong, we were educated, and we were taught to depend on no one except my grandfather. So, you know the struggle was real when it came time to submit to my husband. We recently decided to move in with my in-laws while we house hunted. Living with them has opened my eyes in so many ways. I got to see what true submission and spiritual guidance looked like. Which is probably why my one example being a recent one. So, I guess we are all going to learn this lesson together.

My husband is the spiritual leader of our family and I am so thankful for him. I pray that my blogs are encouraging to you. I am not perfect and constantly fall short, but we are all growing and learning.

Until next time.




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